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Wednesday, December 19, 2018

Ben-smile. Don Come Again With Random Jokes...
*We live in a world where women believe all men are  "cheat and Lairs"

forgetting when they always say
"What a man can do, a woman can do better"

* how Americans compose music
title- rainbow : u look beautiful with your pretty eye ur charming smile ur glowing hair ho girl ho girl u are just like the "rainbow" u are as beautiful as nature its self..........
how Nigerians compose music title rainbow : rainbow  rainbow rainbow rainbow rainbow rainbow u resemble rainbow my baby
i will buy you bugati no be lie i fit die make thunder fire me rainbow oo rainbow ooo rainbow oooo baby girl oya follow me to the rainbow make we panana..........

i feel like crying!

*This life sef, So easy to lose focusπŸ˜•πŸ˜•πŸ˜• One minute you are determined to save money at all cost. The next minute you are buying Suya saying "I cannot Kill Myself

**At my age, my mom is still bringing back rice from a wedding for me. Is God not wonderful? πŸ˜ƒπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜†

**D way young boys smoke weed nowadays eh😨😏
Is Dat how big boys do??😟😏
Lemmi tell una, 
Small boys smoke weed.

Real men smoke fire wood 😏😏
So, Are u a real man or small boy?? πŸ˜‚πŸšΆπŸšΆπŸšΆπŸšΆπŸšΆ

*Nobody from imo state has the right to be Sad 😞 😟😟
Bcos no other state has a commissioner for happiness 😭😭😭🚢🚢🚢

*Harmattan, The Season That Changes Soft Lips Into Iron Sponge. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ πŸ˜‚

 * So funny how some people will
buy (sachet water)PURE WATER and finish it in less dan one minute... But d day dey finally
buy BOTTLE Water,
it takes like 2 hours to finish it. wen dey keep opening and closing like say e get doctor's prescription
But why na...

**I thought I knew English until I heard my neighbour explaining the difference between Email and Gmail,
(1)Email - the mails which are sent using Electricity
(2)Gmail -the mails which are sent using a Generator πŸ˜…πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

My people,  Wat about Hot mail and Yahoo mail?? πŸ˜„πŸƒπŸƒπŸƒπŸƒπŸƒ

Sunday, December 16, 2018

Ben-Smile Jokes

πŸ‘‘πŸ‘‘ Ben-Smile JokesπŸ‘‘πŸ‘‘
πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚**Turn to ur neighbour and say*
*Shout it loud* *NEIGHBOUR.....*
*Shout it louder* *NEIGHBOUR.....*
*next WEEK I must buy*
πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ You think you mean the world to some people , until you enter their heart and discover you are just a small village without light and waterπŸ˜‚
πŸ˜‚ Because they call you phone engineer you
are now wearing helmet to repair phone
What's your aim oga??πŸ˜‘
πŸ˜’The only difference between harmattan and winter is just visa♨ abi na lie
πŸ˜‰Make una help me thank God for my life
I almost landed myself in serious trouble today,I nearly asked a girl out,forgetting we are still in December♨
Dis harmattan breeze just carried my slim frd 2 d next junction.
Plz if you're slim put Rocks in ur pockets.
πŸ˜ͺWhile your mother is praying that you
should have a long life, you're in your
boyfriend's house shouting ''Ooohh yes!!!
baby kill me''
My sister you are wasting your mother's
πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚. One Kiss On Her Neck & She's breathing
Like a hair dryer
Women are dramaticπŸ˜’πŸ˜‚
😁😁If anger could be converted to electricity,
Lagos alone would power Nigeria.
The number of angry people there is alarming.
πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚It is only in Nollywood movies witches will appear somewhere and  first thing they do is to laugh🀦🏽‍♂πŸ™„Please what's funny??πŸ˜’
πŸ˜€πŸ˜€The only exercise I've done this month is, "Running out of money"!
Come see how I have reduced in weight.
πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚Some people will finish bathing with a bucket and say "I just showered"🚿🚿😳😳my dear you just bucketedπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚be real for once
πŸ˜€πŸ˜€ME: Baby, I heard u lost ur phoneπŸ˜•
Girl: Yes love
ME: Oya dash me the charger naaπŸ™„πŸ™„
πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚If you die a virgin, u will still go to hell because u disobeyed a simple instruction "GO INTO THE WORLD AND MULTIPLYπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
πŸ˜€πŸ˜€*imagine if girls start doing rituals like guys,  they don't need to use iPhone or Benz to lure guys*  
*All they need to say is baby come to my house,i am home alone*🀣🀣🀣🀣
* chain..No guy for remain Ooh abi na lie Babes????*πŸƒπŸΌ‍♀
πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ I was soo worried last night.
Am not sure my future wife slept in the house.... Baby, please where did you go??😒😭
πŸ˜€πŸ˜€Guys that carry condoms in their wallets, what exactly is your purpose in life??? So you are walking on the road and hoping to see a girl and climbing on her like a fowl abi..
Let me just  mind my business...
πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚I want to marry a woman as funny and crazy as I am.
Imagine waking up by 2am and start laughing bcoz we 4got to pick our kids from School
😁😁Happy Sunday but I didn't go to Church still washing plate for the restaurant i took my girlfriend to😭she ordered more than my wallet😟

Friday, December 14, 2018


People who judge others by What they post on
social media have the strongest mouth odour
Don't argue plz, this is science πŸ˜ƒπŸ˜ƒπŸ˜‚

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Wednesday, December 12, 2018


Ben-Smile Jokes

πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ LAUGH OUT  πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

1.Girls are fun of saying: i gave u everything, i gave u my body, is this how u pay me back? My sister didn't i give u my own body too?? Make i hear some girl tell me that nonsense again!!πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
2.*Girls are like an internet virus: they enter your life, scan your pockets, transfer money, edit your mind, download their problems and delete your smile...*
4.I stopped reciting *Nigerian pledge ever since *1cup* of rice became N100.
To serve Nigeria with which strength,when I never chop♨
5.I was struggling with my Biology examination when one slay queen asked "please is skeleton a wild animal?" Chai!!! Invigilator has fainted ,we are now fainting according to our exam numbers, & am just waiting for my turn to faint...😨😨😨😰😨
6.When u propose to a beautiful girl and she does not accept , my brother don't insult or blame her. She is saving u from drinking garri πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
7.If this doesn't make u laugh, then nothing can make u laughπŸ˜‚
*STARBOY* : Did u c my mssg ?
*SAMIDY* : D one u said I shud borrow u ten thousand ?
*STARBOY*: yes
*SAMIDY* : I didn't c it
8.Girls with big butt produce the best fart!
The flavour can follow you for 6hourz like Hausa
9.If he no longer cleans his room when you visit…
My sister just know that you’ve been promoted
from side chick to main chickπŸ˜’πŸ˜’πŸ˜’
10.I nearly fainted😳 this afternoon when a certain gyal here in this group πŸ˜‚told me I'm one of her friends on xender*. Should mention her name ???
11.I have Upgraded my whatsapp over 10 times this year... No difference... The smileys still look like DAVIDO head...😏😏😏😏
12.*Some journalists visited a village n went straight to the king, one of the interviewers asked de king*
*JOURNALISTS :sir, as a ruler of this community, tell us your plan*
*KING :(provokedπŸ˜‰) ',you are calling me a ruler? your father is a pencil, your mother is eraser, you ar a sharpener. Infact all ur family is a maths set. Foolish man*
Pastor said to the congregation:"turn to your left and tell your neighbor ' it shall be permanent in your life' ".
A young boy turns to his left and saw a cripple. He became confused ,he stared for some minutes and he told the cripple " don't mind the pastor".
The cripple said #na_God_save_u"
14.Love❤ used to be blind but now
it has received its treatment.πŸ™†‍♂
Now it looks at u, ur pocket, ur family & social status & even ur bank accout balance too.πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
15.I wrote comment "you look so beautiful my love" on my girlfriend picture and she replied "thanks bro"
16.I texted my Ex *'Hi'* and she quickly updated Status *'Doing fine without you'* . See this girl oh ohhπŸ˜„πŸ˜„, who told her i want her back?
Jus wanted to tell her, *i saw her dad in town today wearing my Cap she took*.πŸ˜„πŸ˜ΉπŸ˜ΉπŸ˜ΉπŸ˜Ή
17.Those of you that promised when you were small and said
how far nah
Una never grow???
18.πŸ‡³πŸ‡¬I think *Facebook* should stop this tagging 😏
Someone tagged me in a Post that He was *Smoking weed with me and 16 others* My father came across this Post and Since yesterday I've not been able to Step in our own *House*πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
19.If you grab her phone and she fights for it.
My brother, you're single! Stop wasting your time
20.If it was Yoruba people that invented the ATM Machine ehn,
And u used ur left hand to withdraw the money, the machine would retract the money, hiss and show you *"Insufficient Home Training" πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
21.Unknown person :Knock Knock
Peter:Who is there?
Unknown person :Its opportunity
Peter :You lie. Opportunity knocks but once, you Knock more than once, you are jehovah Witness.... πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸƒπŸƒπŸƒπŸƒπŸƒ
22.All these girls with small boob should be banned from wearing bra....
How can you be caging what is trying to grow?? πŸ˜” πŸ˜” πŸ˜” πŸ˜”
That is unfair nowπŸ˜πŸ˜πŸ˜œπŸ˜‹
Yeee .. Who stone meπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
23.Ever since i joined Facebook I have never seen a girl standing straight in a picture. Or
Have u ever seen it my brotherπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ’―πŸ˜ŠπŸ˜‚
24.Fat girls πŸ‘­ be like I dnt lik #photo grid...
Hia! my sister we all knw you dnt fit in the frame..Simple!!πŸ˜‚ πŸ˜‚ πŸ˜‚
25.Short Boys will still sag,
Then their trousers will now be looking like soaked pampersπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
26.*The Way I'm Broke Now, I'm Thinking Of Selling Our Dog. I Will Do The Barking At Night πŸ˜­πŸ˜­πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜πŸ˜
27.My sister, tell him you are coming to visit him and let that idiot clean his room for at least once in a month and then switch off your Phone.
Robert Mugabe
28.Son .Dad my stomach is paining and aching
Dad. Son it is because you stomach is empty
Son .Dad now I understand why you always have head ache.
29.If she wears her bra backwards first and then slide it around,my brother marry that woman.😷😷😷
30.Welcome to Africa 🌍 where ladies match shoes with their handbags but there are not able to match babies with their fathers... πŸ˜† πŸ˜† πŸ˜† πŸ˜† πŸ˜†
31.I am selling a good second hand girlfriend*
Still attractive with no child and in good condition.
*Model*: 1993
*Br**st quality*: Manageable
*S*x duration*: can last 4 -5hrs
*S*x position*: Any style
Prize negotiable, swap and top up also accepted .
If interested please inbox me.
*Strictly no road test*πŸ˜πŸ˜πŸ˜πŸ˜πŸ˜πŸ’¦πŸ˜‚πŸ’¦
32. Dating a Church Girl is the Best... I cheat, she finds out, we pray together and blame the Devil
33.Guys don't kill yourself because you want satisfy her during sex. If she doesn't scream when making love to her, just bite her nipple.
*I hate stubborn girlsπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚*
34.πŸ‡³πŸ‡¬Akpos, why did you steal the church Clock?
Akpos Replied; I stole it Because God's time is the best.
35. You're in a relationSHIP and u say she's
cheating,have u ever seen a SHIP carrying only
1 person??
Thank God am in a relationBIKEπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
36.Yawa is when a girl break up with you and she later realise that she is pregnant, my dear you and the baby are my Ex.πŸ˜œπŸ˜œπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
37. My luv 4 you All can make me jump in front of a train. As long as its not moving😁😁😁😁

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